How to make it out of Goosebumps Alive

Goosebumps Alive has been created to make you laugh and scream. We've taken over 70 of the Goosebumps books – the '90s kids horror series – and whittled them down to our favourite and most exciting tales. These are not the stories of your youth, however; we've reimagined, remixed, and rebooted them for an adult audience.

Using the vast canvas of The Vaults, we've created 19 rooms as the backdrop to these stories. Some are intimate, taking place in a small, dilapidated flat and some are on a grander scale, in massive cornfields filled with creepy scarecrows or the basement of a mad scientist.

There are darkly comic stories of darkness and dread, claustrophobic experiences of terror and epic and grand sets you couldn't even dream up in your worst nightmares. There will be a ton of stimulation for all of the senses coming at you fast and furiously. So stay alert…

Here are five tips on how to make it out of Goosebumps still breathing:

1. Remember To Take Your Anti-Anxiety Medication

Are you currently or have you ever been under the care of a team of Viennese psychiatrists? Have you ever been institutionalised? Do you need a hefty dose of Xanax to get you through your day? If so, Goosebumps Alive may set you back years and thousands of pounds of wasted therapy. However, if your thing is 'facing your fears', this will be the show for you – you'll be right up next to what frightens you most.

2. There's Strength In Numbers

Upon entry you'll be given an assignment: Spider, Snake, Rat or Crow. Choose the right track – if you're a scaredy cat wuss, and want to opt for a more comedic track, choose Rat or Crow. If you're after scares, request Snake or Spider. Remember though; always stay together. If you're left behind, you'll be left for dead.

3. Internalise Your Fears

There's murder, there's blood, there are dark situations and evil characters and screams will give your location away. Stifling cries is the best way to stay hidden, because evil thrives on fear. Don't draw attention to yourself: scream on the inside.

4. Embrace Your Inner Masochist

Oh, you want more, do you? After your first visit you may be eager for more Goosebumps and immersive therapy. We've created two unique tracks, so you can revisit The Vaults and experience an entirely different journey.

5. Have A Stiff Drink

You may want a little tipple to ease your fears and there is a bar and snacks available at the beginning and end of the production. But we can't guarantee it will help you – you may meet a killer scarecrow, face the haunted mask, escape from a deranged scientist, or be buried alive – but will you ultimately find the real horror lurking deep inside your head?

6. Go Before You Come

The irony of ''Goosebumps Alive' is that we’re trying to scare the, er, bowels out of you, but if you leave to use the loo, there’s no re-entry.

Whatever you do, don't come crying to us if the experience continues to haunt you for nights to come. You've been warned.

By Tom Salamon

Goosebumps Alive runs at the Vaults Theatre until 29 May. Click here for more information and tickets.