Quote/Unquote: 15 great lines we’ve heard at the theatre recently

In the first of a regular new feature, we round up some great lines we’ve heard at recent shows, in the West End and further afield. Click the play titles below the quotes for more info and to buy tickets. Got any to add? Tell us in the comments or on Twitter using #wosquote

1. “The leopard never changes its spots and the slapper never changes her knickers.”

(Suranne Jones as Sandra in Jonathan Harvey‘s Beautiful Thing, Arts Theatre)

© Johan Persson

2. “Famous people shouldn’t be so tiny. It seems dishonest.”

(Judi Dench as Alice Liddell Hargreaves in John Logan‘s Peter and Alice, Noel Coward Theatre)

3. “What gets me just as much as people who treat the Bible like it’s the Constitution are the people who treat the Constitution like it’s the Bible.”

(Sara Powell as Jory in Ayad Akhtar‘s Disgraced, Bush Theatre)

4. “World goes to sleep at night. Wakes up and it needs two things. A cup of coffee and some vicious gossip.”

(Clarke Peters as Henry Brown in David Mamet‘s Race, Hampstead Theatre)

5. “The worst vice is advice, so I don’t give any.”

(Mark Umbers as Franklin Shepard in Stephen Sondheim and George Furth‘s Merrily We Roll Along, Menier Chocolate Factory/Harold Pinter Theatre)

© Johan Persson

6. “The Yank said, ‘Ah, better to get a normal fella who can act crippled than a crippled fella who can’t fecking act at all.'”

(Daniel Radcliffe as Billy in Martin McDonagh‘s The Cripple of Inishmaan, Noel Coward Theatre)

7. “I like you. You’re a nice monster.”

(Seth Numrich as Wayne in Tennessee WilliamsSweet Bird of Youth, Old Vic)

© Johan Persson

8. “I couldn’t find a better husband than Sam and I couldn’t find a better lover than Ned… I need them both to be happy.”

(Anne-Marie Duff as Nina in Eugene O’Neill‘s Strange Interlude, NT Lyttelton)

© Helen Maybanks

9. “No one ever goes back to normal after they’ve been on television.”

(Douglas Hodge as Willy Wonka in David Greig‘s adaptation of Roald Dahl’s Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Theatre Royal, Drury Lane)

© Francis Loney

10. “Being fooled by art is one of the primary pleasures afforded the middle classes. They love it, can’t get enough of it.”

(John Gordon Sinclair as Professor Marcus in Graham Linehan‘s The Ladykillers, Vaudeville Theatre)

© Alastair Muir

11. “The inside of her head is like a masked ball: you never know with whom you’re dancing.”

(Diana Quick as Eva in Richard Greenberg‘s The American Plan, St James Theatre)

© Nobby Clarke

12. “Some people build fences to keep people out, and some people build fences to keep people in.”

(Lenny Henry as Troy in August Wilson‘s Fences, Duchess Theatre)

© Johan Persson

13. “[I’m] exhausted. Sweating like a f***ing dyslexic on Countdown.”

(Nigel Lindsay as Barry in Nick Payne‘s The Same Deep Water As Me, Donmar Warehouse)

14. “If God ever listened to a poor coloured woman, the world would be a different place.”

(Cynthia Erivo as Celie in Marsha Norman‘s adaptation of Alice Walker’s The Color Purple, Menier Chocolate Factory)

15. “Everything perishes save music and love.”

(Rory Keenan as Liola in Luigi Pirandello‘s Liola, NT Lyttelton)