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First Weekend... Check!

By • Scotland
The funny thing about Edinburgh is that you lose all track of time and date. I woke up this morning and thought, is it Thursday? is it Thursday?! I screamed from my glittery pit. My producer (the one who gives me a boot up the bottom each morning with a diary full of appointments and the like, so I can't just watch TV all day!) swiftly reminded me that it was indeed Monday. I peered out from behind my 80's print curtains and winced at the sunlight... gosh I haven't been diurnal for a good few days. The first weekend was a doozy.

Ok so now the sun is out and I am back on track with my diary and wanted to let you know a little about what I have seen and liked and been and partied this weekend. The first footnote is that I have strained my neck from some serious show raving with Jenny on Friday. I select a person in the audience to drink through the show so we can monitor her behaviour and emotions much like my scientists did when I was making my show. At the end we dance and she headbanged, so I had to... something snapped and the rest is osteopathic history. This means I have been drinking quite a lot and on some seriously strong painkillers to numb the hellish pain... I have friends here from LA, they love a good US-prescription-knock-you-out-muscle-relaxant-pills and were very forthcoming when I described the strength of what us brits can get over the counter. So excuse me if my brain is a little fuzzy!

Friday we went to see Doctor Brown's show at the Underbelly. Hilarious. Simply Hilarious. At one point he actually slaps an audience member, comedy light touch slap but still genius that he gets away with it. After that we hung out a bit in the Underbelly bar with the guys from the show and some Soho Theatre peeps. Then it was off to the Club Bar at Assembly, quick shot in the Assembly tents and off to the Loft at the Gilded Ballloon. Now these bars are good but they are quite industry centric and what we want to chat about is PUBLIC and FUN. So we sloped off to Planet Out for a good old gay disco dance... nice little club, good funny music and lots of lovely boys gyrating.

Saturday I had a ticket to the lovely Hannah Walker's The Oh F**k Moment but was so neck achey and frazzled I had to just sleep all day. I am older now and can't stay out til 7am without dying the next day. Dammit. So instead I did my show and took a day off from seeing other peoples art. I came home and watched the Amy Winehouse concert on BBC2, I was there that night, it was one of the best gigs i've ever been to, that woman could SING. I smoked cigarettes in bed on my own in a rather lovely chinese dressing gown and nursed myself. Tramp.

Yesterday I saw the wonderful Aisle16 R Kool at the Banshee Labarinth and they just rocked it. So funny, such good poets (not in that oh i'm a poet, which really means I am a man who thinks he has something amazing to say about the world but don't!) ... but genuinely clever, suprising, hilarious things popping out all over the place. You get to vote at the end on who is the coolest, I voted for John, whose show John Peel's Shed I am going to see at Underbelly this week as it sounds just divine. Its free too and the beers good. Go.

Right now I am off to Assembly to do a photoshoot and interview for the Scotsman, in a pretty outfit made for a clown. Then I am organising my props which are all filthy and in disarray. Then its off to Greg Maclaren at Zoo for his champion of a show "Doris Day can F**k Off!" (don't ask me why all the shows I want to see have expletives in the title!) before rushing back to be filmed by BBC. Oh the glamourous life of a performance artist!

Right must go and slather 100 tonnes of make up and a neck brace on for this shoot...

Tootles

Bryony x

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