Rob Madge’s Regards to Broadway

“It’s two weeks before I’m due to make my Broadway debut. I’m midway through packing my suitcase, putting my passport in its cute little holder from Dunelm (maybe after New York I’ll be able to afford a John Lewis one) and I receive a phone call. “Hey Mr Producer!” I sing in the style of Andrea McArdle. I then see my agent is also on the line. I know what it is. They want Jinkx Monsoon to play me on matinees to get a few more bums on seats but I have told them, she can’t do a Brummie accent. “Rob”, I hear, “We are going to have to postpone”. White noise. Like that sound effect when someone gets diagnosed with an illness on Coronation Street. My legs give way and I fall onto the bed (cos I’m dramatic like that). I look at the open suitcase, resigning myself to the fact I will never get my John Lewis passport holder. Four in a Bed’s on the telly. In the space of one phone call, I’ve gone from potential Broadway star and Tony Award winner to unassuming armchair critic of Seaside Shores B&B.” When Rob was 12 they used to put on shows in the living room. When Rob was 26 their show about putting on shows in the living room was meant to transfer to Broadway. When Rob was 27 this Broadway transfer got postponed. Join Rob as they return to their family home in the Midlands and experience the greatest humbling of their life.