Features

Audience Etiquette

Are you on your best behaviour at the theatre? In an electronic age, it’s easy to lose consideration for fellow audience members. Mark Shenton & Roger Foss outline the new rules of theatre etiquette & tell you how to avoid other problems on the night.

Editorial Staff

| London's West End |

26 July 2004

In a couch potato age where so many people spend their leisure time interacting with the television set, the PC or the Playstation, some theatre virgins may need a gentle reminder that they’re in a theatre surrounded by other people and no longer flicking channels at home!

Despite the routine, and increasingly good-humoured, pre-curtain up announcements to switch off mobiles, pagers and watch alarms, one or more will be sure to go off at every performance, often at a dramatic moment that will destroy the atmosphere and throw the actors. Some mobile phone owners have even been known to take the call. Others have been spotted text messaging in the middle of a performance.

Etiquette Do’s & Don’ts

If theatregoing is to remain a pleasure for everyone, we suggest the following theatrical no-no’s and luvvie do’s and don’ts ought to be compulsory:

Never use mobile phones, pagers, bleepers or wristwatch alarms. Switch them off before you enter the theatre

Tape recording, photographing or videoing performances is illegal

Talking during performances or constantly nodding and smiling to your partner is disruptive to those around you. Save up your comments until the interval or after the show

Never sing-a-long-a to your favourite show songs. Unless it’s Mamma Mia!, leave it to the guys and gals on stage

Avoid unwrapping sweets or munching crisps from crinkly packets

Leave babes-in-arms and toddlers at home with a babysitter

Never arrive late: always double check the performance time before you set out

Never ever buy tickets from scalpers, the touts who scurry around the entrances to many West End theatres selling dodgy deals

Consumers Beware

West End theatre managements often need reminding that patrons are not there to be milked of money. With the exorbitant price of add-ons like programmes and drinks, it can often feel as if you are being mugged as soon as you walk through the front door. So here’s our luvvie consumer warning list:

Programmes can cost up to £3 and may contain no more than a cast list, production photos and biographies. Look through the publication first and if it seems a bit thin for the money search out the free cast lists available at many theatres

Beware of merchandising. While it’s tempting to buy the poster and the t-shirt on the night, cast recordings, CDs and videos are often more expensive in theatre gift shops than from the usual record stores. Ask to flick through the glossy but often over-priced souvenir brochures before purchasing

Bar prices often come as a shock to the uninitiated. Some West End theatre bars even insist on selling `doubles’ only, and a bottle of mineral water can cost twice as much as you are used to. Take your own

Ice creams don’t come cheap either. A measly little tub might set you back a couple of quid, so think twice before you buy (pop out instead to a newsagent store nearby, if you can!)

Comfort Zones

Smoking is not permitted in the auditoria of any London theatres, but unlike on Broadway, it is allowed in most of the public areas, including foyers and bars, with the admirable exception of the Savoy Theatre which is nicotine-free throughout. Some theatres, like the Donmar Warehouse, have now introduced smoke-free bars.

Another legacy of an era when West End theatregoing was a glamorous act of celebration is the loos, which are now mostly cramped curios, often tucked away in awkward corners and almost inaccessible to the able-bodied, let alone the disabled.

With London’s climate changing, air-conditioning is sadly rare in West End theatres and non-existent on the black box fringe so be prepared to sweat it out on hot summer nights – or take a fan and litres of bottled water (don’t buy them at the bar, where the prices are astronomic). Beware the term ‘air-cooled’. This usually means someone can open a window somewhere!

Ticket Dramas

Things that go wrong on the night can include arriving late, forgetting your tickets, finding your seats have been double booked, you can’t see, you feel ill, you fall over or are injured, you are disturbed by a constant talker, someone steals your handbag, the star actor is on holiday or off sick, or for some reason the entire show is cancelled.

The first port of call for ticketing problems is the box office manager, or if you’ve bought from an agency, get back to them as soon as possible. The house manager is responsible for all other problems, but if you are not satisfied with his/her solution, get in touch with the theatre management head office the next day (the address will be in the programme).

And, if all else fails, contact the Development Office, The Society of London Theatre, 32 Rose Street, London, WC2E 9ET (Tel: 020-7557 6700). SOLT also runs an emergency helpdesk for ticket problems (0870 153 5353). And always check when booking to ensure that the star of the show is not off on holiday on the day of your choice.

The above has been extracted from the new Harden’s Theatregoers’ Handbook 2005 (priced £7.99), written by Whatsonstage.com contributing editor Mark Shenton and What’s On In London magazine’s Roger Foss. For more information and to order your copy now, click here.